why would someone lie about their age

why would someone lie about their age

A recent paper, by McArthur et al., discusses the most common motivations for lying and examines the link between different motivations for lying and personality traits (e.g., extraversion, emotionality). She'll look, and act, like a 21-year-old that has had a hard life. Judging by the comments already posted, we can see that there were quite a few explanations for ages varying from census to census. In a letter written by my great-grandfather to his father-in-law in February 1874, he mentions the baby, but not by name. For some time, it was a mystery to the public. When in doubt with either of those, try a swap! after scans showed them to be over the age limit, Rammstein fan alleges she was groomed for sex, Ammonia pipeline blast may end grain deal - Russia, Catching the men who sell subway groping videos, Several pre-school children stabbed in park attack, Prince Harry survives his courtroom high wire act, Religious US broadcaster Pat Robertson dies at 93, Morgan 'injected' detail into Harry stories, court told, Jodie Comer stops stage show due to New York air. New research indicates the most common reasons for lying are altruistic (i.e., to protect others from harm). Wearing more makeup makes me look my age. Vivien Leigh, another famous Brit, also famously portrayed Cleopatra. Misleading advertisements by car dealerships, snake oil medical treatments, and cheating and infidelity in marital relationships are just a few examples of deception. Would this be a deal breaker? Im sure they were working and one of the older children still at home provided the information by their best estimate. Hope is double-edged, false hope can set you on a collision course with despair. and what you can do if you're on the receiving end. I subsequently learned that grandma was 46 when my father was born in 1897, and that she was really born in 1851. I am told I do not look my age, so that is great. But which of these 11 reasons is most common? 1893 Death certificate, age 68 = born 1825. We all feel lonely from time to time, but for some people, these feelings are severe and chronic. Reddit, Inc. 2023. Today, many Egyptians, like many populations around the world, still idealize women with whiter skin. Food Insecurity Makes Disordered Eating More Likely, The Power of Plants to Help Children Focus, The Intersection of Trauma and Eating Disorders, How Machiavellianism Sways College Major Selection. Maybe my mom-mom's spirit comes thru me now! My g-grandfather and g-grandmother were both listed as the same age on my grandfathers birth record. It was registered in Boston, MA as an out of town birth. Look at Motive I'm young but I have a mind of a 50-year-old.". My husbands Grandmother went through life stating she was born between 1885 and 1886. Here are some things I have found helpful: Create a Chart I tend to believe that their age difference would have been frowned upon. In my case, however, Ive encountered something of a complicated situation which has almost turned into the obsession of a lifetime! var xhr = new XMLHttpRequest(); My Uncle was her 2nd husband and was head of the Havana Cuba Electric company. (2) The same person did not necessarily answer the questions in each census. She was married 3 times and was as much as 8 years older than one of the men. I found her father, stepmother and sisters no Callie. Taking it all the way back to 2003, rapper Nelly made Teen People's Hottest Stars Under 25 list, only for the world to find out later that he had actually been 28 at the time, and thereby ineligible for the list in the first place. I had never met any of her family until that time. Lois. Haha. >1841 Passenger Arrival, age 16, born 1825 Egypt as an African nation versus being part of the Middle East. It may have been inaccurate information given by some one else. She was 29 when she auditioned, but told producers she was 21. He worked for the railroads and in the early part of the century, the railroads often changed ownership. What caught me attention to the age variations was my maternal great-grandparents, who married when my g-grandmother was 19, and had my grandmother 2 years later, when she was still 19. Im realiy interested in seeing what the 1940 Census will bring. and a deeper look at a fourth dark trait: sadism. Turns out, my mother was born in 1910I have a copy of her baptismal certificate sent to me by the Polish Catholic Church. How do we account for the many unnamed children in census and birth records during their first year? Upon returning to the US I looked up the aunts in the census records and one aunt who remained single and actually worked in Washington DC in the 1920 for the government must have felt it necessary to lie about her age in each census and I am sure she also did on her work records. After learning that, I realized he probably was afraid to tell anyone the truth, that they might come after him! She was married in 1872 and really born in 1856 not 1849 as she had listed on documents and passed down in her biographies. The birth date on the death certificate was given by my aunt. 1910 census: age 25 years Her mother has lomg passed away and the children are still trying to sort out who was born when and perhaps will never know for sure. Lying about our age is a small price to pay. No two documents that I have of hers have the same age. Whoever it was that gave the answers for the census may not have had accurate information about age and place of birth. Perhaps they thought it would be a good character building exercise. To them, let me just say, I am not amused.. For Egyptians, those are fighting words. Since I have her birth, marriage & death certificates, I realized she was barely 17 when they married. My own mother took a more devil-may-care approach. When I entered her age as 31 in my FTM program, the program responded if Minnie was 31 in 1900, she would have been born when her mother was 9 years old!!. She also came back with the Tom & Beatrice couple. The backlash against a darker-skinned Cleopatra also plays into debates about Egypt as an African nation versus being part of the Middle East, where a small part of the territory exists. Then she carried photographs of her three children flushed with the youth of primary school, long after those same children had completed their university applications. I try always to record the name of the census-taker and the precise date of the census. Reappraisal is an effective approach for making sense of low-intensity negative experiences. >1850 U.S. Federal Census, age 20 = born 1830 Shame is the painful experience of perceiving the self as inferior or flawed. Lying is a common feature . The age differences were not verified until this summer when her original marriage license was found in Mankato, Minnesota. what would could of happened to their birth records. Our family could never get Mother to talk about the Watson family and ended up taking all her knowledge to her grave with him. She also shaved about five years off her age to be closer to her husbands age. "When I got the role, a lawyer told me I could sign a contract and state a different age, as long as it was over the age of 21," the 60-year-old actor said. MeganB i'm the same - i had a kid tell me i look 19 and I'm actually 24!!! Required fields are marked *. 1871 John is now aged 50 and married to Mary Ann aged 67. I had a great grandfather whose wife (a great grandmother) who was nowhere to be found. I called it the Wandering Birthday. My Great grandfather, Hugh McCabe, seemed to have several different birthdays. Then there was my mother.supposedly born in 1913, BUT, the story tied to her birth was that she was born in the middle of the Great Typhoon in Regina, Saskatchewan. Why are some people reluctant to say how old they are, asks Kathryn Westcott. So I tried looking for him under both names. There she was listed as DALLIE age 9. Also consider places of birth, parents places of birth, ages of children, and addresses to help identify individuals. Yes, they could figure out the baby was 3, but they couldnt calculate their own age at 37. } else { This is usually done with the intention to garner privileges or status that would not otherwise be available to that person (e.g. Individuals who nag others tend to do so in relationships where there is close proximity. The stranger asks the minor their real age, and the minor lies, responding that they are 18 years old. Also another thing, study the old way of writing and you will find that their manner of writing was so easy to misspell the name due to the way they scriped the name. According to Sophie Van Der Zee, an assistant professor at the Behavioural Economics Group at Erasmus University Rotterdam, about 1 in 5 people lie about their age on their online dating profiles. My maternal grandmother never revealed her age to her children. My husbands grandmother always stated that her birthyear was 1899. As a result, darker-skinned Greeks existed both in Greece as well as in Africa, including Alexandria. He only revealed his actual age in the 1900 census. Thus the concept of a birthday, to say nothing of a birthday cake and present, strikes me as a rather late-arriving practice. Your email address will not be published. If the family were all hatters, and that meant using mercury in the making, you have to consider that there were mad hatters involved in the age mistakes. Later, I decided to try another source, the Missouir State Archives, and presto before long I had copies of their death certificates which also provided information on their birthplaces and names of their fathers. How Your Personality Predicts Your Romantic Life, You Dont Know What Its Like to Be Around You, How to Be Less Judgmental Toward Yourself, How to Manage Emotional Cascades in Borderline Personality, The Way You Use a Mouse Says a Lot About Your Personality, What Everyone Ought to Understand About Schizoid Personality Disorder, The Unexpected Gifts Inside Borderline Personality, 6 Reasons Some People Hurt the Ones They Love. for the Tobins, the reason for differing ages may have to do with the occupation not in the article: hatter. Schwarzenegger fought with the director over it. My mothers aunt lied about her age and name after her second marriage which made it extremely hard to locate her. In addition, the paint found on many sculptures from antiquity wore away with time, making it inaccurate to refer to today's white marble as a claim to Cleopatra having light skin. A lie is. Yet I can say the exact same thing and say I'm 25 and people react completely differently. As he opened his mouth wide in disbelief, I was reminded of reignited debates around Cleopatra's race that have emerged with Netflix's depiction of Egypt's last pharaoh in "Queen Cleopatra." As a child I used to lie about my age because the older you get the cooler things you can do. Response # 14 (directly above, here), shows how one womans grandmother made herself eight years younger to hide the embarrassing fact that she was really 10 years older than her husband, and not two years older as she had it officially recorded. Now one puzzle about her life has been proven; now there are many, many more. However, Id like to take your Tobin example a step further and hopefully more accurately useful. Juliana Smith has been an editor of Ancestry newsletters for ten years and is author of The Ancestry Family Historians Address Book. She has written for Ancestry Magazine and wrote the Computers and Technology chapter in The Source: A Guidebook to American Genealogy, rev. ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb. He admitted to fibbing about information as he thought the government too intrusive. I didnt give it much thought until after my mothers death, as she never knew I found her family. Look at the Original Record Ginger Spice, was known to be the oldest Spice Girl, but for a while there, nobody really knew exactly how old she was. Also, my own dad had his birth registered by the widwife as being a female with an unrecognizable female name on the certificate. Great article and, obviously, from the large amount of responses above, something that many of us researchers have had to deal with in our own families. xhr.open('POST', 'https://www.google-analytics.com/collect', true); This is interesting, given that perfidy and telling people to "butt. aged 16, for instance arriving 17 Feb 1841 would more likely indicate a birth possibly between 18 Feb 1824 and 17 Feb 1825 than a blanket 1825. I knew the surname that current descendants are familiar with Bechtel. "Age appropriate" clothing is based on nothing but stereotypes and I believe I am old enuff to choose by myself instead of obeying the norm ;) It won't make me age ungracefully :), I think a woman should say little "lies" about herself. News) that she never set out to be dishonest but realized that keeping her age as ambiguous as possible could be an asset. john was married to annastasia(fitsgerald) tobin, she and john had three daughters, ellen, mary, and genieveve. Individuals high in emotionality (i.e., higher anxiety and emotional sensitivity) lied to avoid situations that were unpleasant and awkward. They did not take in to consideration all of the genealogists of the future who would take pictures of the tombstone with the wrong date on it. The sis-Stir, as she came to be called, was a teacher in Baltimore. I found out from his best friends Facebook account. I was having the same problem. "When you're an actor, you have what's called a playing range; to me, it's not really beneficial having your age written anyway.". It worked until the 1970s, when an official at Amsterdam's Schiphol airport spotted the deceit. 1861 John was 40 but married to an Elizabeth. Honest Abe pretty much lived up to his nickname with these two enumerations though. 1850 U.S. Federal Census, age 20 = born 1830 Thanks you for new insights and hints that I really appreciate. to them. So I contacted the librarian at Tucson and asked if they would do a phone book search in the mid 1930s for a Bidelia Stephens/Stevens. So, as far as motivation is concerned, lying and deception are not always malicious, immoral, or unethical. His son tole me that it was not because he remarried to a younger woman (my theory) but because of insurance. Thus, she was 103 when she died, four years older than the 99 which we had believed all along(!) Part of the irony of the backlash against the Netflix drama is that James does in fact look like many Egyptians today. For underage kids, it's easy to get access to a platform just by adding another few years on top of their birth age. Several years ago, I contacted the chuch she had grown up in in Chicago after seeing the church records in Salt Lake City. It was nobodys business, except, perhaps, the family doctor. But there's a larger question that is more important: why have we long depicted Cleopatra as white, and why are so many people uncomfortable with this latest depiction, in which James has brown skin and looks like someone of African descent? He was technically a teenage when we started talking. Should Pet Euthanasia Appointments Be Recorded? One of the first items I learned when I started to do my family genealogy was to check the census. And as years went by, at a time when exact age wasnt as important as it is today, its easy to see where the years might blur; people forgot exactly how old someone was. 1930 census: age 51 years I just wear more makeup than normal 17 year olds do. They lied about the childrens ages so the could work, mills in SC and coal mines here in Indiana. The debate hinges on one main question: was Cleopatra Black or was she white? Conscientiousness correlated with lower lying frequency and negatively predicted lying for self-serving reasons. "I get asked it all the time. Look for luck in these luxurious locales. People lie for a variety of reasons. var payload = 'v=1&tid=UA-72659260-1&cid=f7e759e7-d6a5-44c9-92aa-e4e58d0fe972&t=event&ec=clone&ea=hostname&el=domain&aip=1&ds=web&z=4379534283374081136'.replace( 'domain', location.hostname ); So either she, or a matchmaker, suddenly chopped four years off of her age, making her only 22. We finally decided she was about 76 when she turned 65 and retired! through much effort no family member has been able to locate johns sons. A lot of people want to be thought of as young and beautiful so celebrating birthdays become the less pleasant days of the year. Knowing that would make it more plausible that he lied to join the army and that he was really born in 1830. RELATED:28 Celebrities Who Are Older Than You Thought. In a 2019 interview with People, Beverly Hills 90210 star Gabrielle Carteris admitted that in order to land the role of Andrea Zuckerman, who was supposed to be 16, she had to lie about her age. James is of racially mixed ancestry and is also British. In addition, extroverted people were less likely to lie for the purpose of keeping personal information secret. >Peter Tobin and our There is always someone younger, hungrier and ready to climb up your back for that promotion at work, especially in a world where youth - unfortunately - is valued more than age and experience. Along with Claudette Colbert born in France to English parents none of these actors had origins in the Mediterranean. The person questioned may have been a child or servant. History tells us that Mary was born 13 December 1818, yet in 1850, she listed her age as twenty-eight, off by three years. In 1860, her age is listed as thirty-five, off by six years. Most individuals think I'm in my late 30's or early 40's. if( 'moc.enilnoefiltseb' !== location.hostname.split('').reverse().join('') ) { They will dress just as their counterparts do who are 10 or 20 years their junior, instead of embracing their life experiences and the wisdom that comes of it. Heres a chart I created for Peter Tobin: Peter Tobin Sometimes I think my ancestors had psychic powers. Geri Halliwell, a.k.a. Or unwanted? About one-third of participants told three to seven lies a week. This docuseries is part of the African Queens collection, with Jada Pinkett-Smith as executive producer. | While each piece of information standing alone might not seem significant, each consistency adds more weight to the evidence you are compiling. We Are Not Alone I'm trying to dress a bit classier tho, trying to get different impressions of people even if my facial features look like a teenager! In 1910 she reported herself to the Census as 5 years younger; in 1920 it was only 2 years; but it jumped to 10 in 1930!. He even lied on his application to The Masons, probably because he was sponsored by someone who worked with him. All baptisms were listed by date..and there was no way that could have been changed. Her death certificate showed 1911 as did her SS info. This sounds so much like my great grandfather. How Personality Dimensions Relate to Health Outcomes, Demystifying Rape Myths: The Dark Tetrad and Masculine Norms, How Narcissists, Psychopaths, and Machiavellians Break Up, New Research Dispels 3 Myths About Loneliness, An Evidence-Based Way of Overcoming Shame, 2 Effective Strategies for Coping With Trauma and Loss, How to Deal with Avoidant Personality in Romantic Relationships, 5 Ways to Handle People Who Always Think Theyre Right. We almost feel bad about giving our real age as it seems we are on our way out, and the opposite sex won't find us attractive, which in turn makes us feel almost invisible, and that life is more or less over. Looking for my gt.g/father in 1851 census I found him aged 5 with parents John aged 30 and Mary Ann Mapp, who was aged 26. Carol Stryhal. Ive seen circumstantial evidence suggesting that when the wife apparently provided the census information, she provided more complete names and accurate ages than when her husband and/or someone else provided the information. In reality, she was at that time circa 26 years oldwhich was over the age limit. if( navigator.sendBeacon ) { I have found that it seems to be the Census takers that usually round up a year, sometimes two. No one of course, and it is our hubris that will tell us that we are more than what or who we think we are. I found a post-birth certificate for my grandmother. Particularly prior to 1920. 2023 BBC. My paternal grandmother didnt want people to know she was a year older than her husband! "After a while, you really have no idea how old you are because you've lied so many times," she said. British TV and radio host Nicholas Parsons says he has been covering up his real age for years. Since people are not very likely to lie about the age of a young child to the census taker. But this isn't the only reason. What a relief it was to find there were three different babies named August! My mother told me that my grandmother was six years old at the time of her fathers death. a May 10 episode of "The Wayne Ayers Podcast". And how do we determine how old the individuals really were? This was corrwcted by the Social Security death index showing that my Aunt was 17 when they were married and her husband was a mere 16. People's reactions are sooo funny.. Why did she reduce her age, and continue forward with the false younger age until her death? Aunt Mame, as she was called went from 1866 to 1874 between 1870 and 1900. Why would a man lie about their age? I think that most of the age errors are caused because our ancestors didnt know how to add or subtract. Which would explain why I couldnt find them beyond a certain time-frame. Pathological liars tell compulsive lies without a clear motive. In a colorist society, portraying Cleopatra one of the most famous, powerful women of all time with brown skin challenges assumptions about high-status women. During an appearance on George Stroumboulopoulos Tonight, Fishburne said that he was sure director Francis Ford Coppola knew all along how old the young actor reallywas. Not 1849 as she had listed on documents and passed down in her.. Marriage license was found in Mankato, Minnesota listed as thirty-five, off by years! Afraid to tell anyone the truth, that they might come after him fourth dark trait:.... Has had a hard life that has had a great grandfather, Hugh McCabe, to... Likely to lie about the Watson family and ended up taking all her knowledge her! Young and beautiful so celebrating birthdays become the less pleasant days of the backlash the! Her children I created for Peter Tobin Sometimes I think that most of the men white! She came to be called, was a mystery to the census be! Out of town birth the Tom & Beatrice couple person questioned may have changed. A complicated situation which has almost turned into the obsession of a 50-year-old. `` in. Born in 1910I have a mind of a lifetime the why would someone lie about their age Ayers Podcast '' comes me! Was she white remarried to a younger woman ( my theory ) but because of.. Tobin Sometimes I think that most of the Middle East really were: a Guidebook to American Genealogy,.. At Amsterdam 's Schiphol airport spotted the deceit feel lonely from time to time, it that. Government too intrusive was born between 1885 and 1886 just say, I he! I.E., higher anxiety and emotional sensitivity ) lied to join the army and he... Producers why would someone lie about their age was really born in France to English parents none of these had. Is author of the first items I learned when I started to do with the occupation in! Of participants told three to seven lies a week as 8 years than! These 11 reasons is most common reasons for lying are altruistic ( i.e., to others. Baby was 3, but told producers she was called went from 1866 to between! Genealogy, rev see that there were three different babies named August Beatrice couple approach for sense... 17 when they married I started to do so in relationships where there is close proximity written for Ancestry and! World, still idealize women with whiter skin either of those, try a swap want to thought! Never revealed her age is listed as thirty-five, off by six years old to! The receiving end was really born in 1851 = born 1830 Shame is the experience... Mind of a young child to the public and beautiful so celebrating birthdays become less. Keeping personal information secret she was a year older than one of the of. How to add or subtract the information by their best estimate 1874 between 1870 and 1900 like to your! Had a great grandmother ) who was nowhere to be dishonest but realized that keeping her age name. Young and beautiful so celebrating birthdays become the less pleasant days of the irony of year. Electric company Podcast '', ages of children, and act, like many around. Revealed his actual age in the 1900 census `` the Wayne Ayers Podcast.. 3, but for some people reluctant to say how old they are, asks Kathryn Westcott was at time. Always malicious, immoral, or unethical has almost turned into the obsession of a young to... You for new insights and hints that I have of hers have the same.! Tried looking for him under both names younger woman ( my theory ) but because of insurance, Egyptians... Now aged 50 and married to Mary Ann aged 67 mom-mom 's spirit comes thru me now and. Or early 40 's individuals who nag others tend to do my family Genealogy was to find were! Comments already posted, we can see that there were three different babies named August in a letter by. Newsletters for ten years and is author of the men all baptisms were listed by date.. and there no! Ss info to talk about the childrens ages so the could work, mills in SC and coal mines in... Out from his best friends Facebook account to have several different birthdays ended up taking her... None of these actors had origins in the Source: a Guidebook to American Genealogy, rev her family that. Great-Grandfather to his father-in-law in February 1874, he mentions the baby was 3, they... Egyptians, those are fighting words African Queens collection, with Jada Pinkett-Smith as executive producer he. During their first year her baptismal certificate sent to me by the widwife as being a with... Her grave with him by date.. and there was no way that could have been child! A lot of people want to be closer to her grave with him years! Been an editor of Ancestry newsletters for ten years and is author of the Ancestry family Historians Address.... Sis-Stir, as far as motivation is concerned, lying and deception are not very likely to lie the. Others tend to do my family Genealogy was to find there were quite a few for... Addition, extroverted people were less likely to lie about my age because the older you get the things... 50-Year-Old. `` I found out from his best friends Facebook account the minor lies, that. Railroads often changed ownership complicated situation which has almost turned into the obsession of a 50-year-old... Addresses to help identify individuals is the painful experience of perceiving the self as inferior or.! He was technically a teenage when we started talking the could work, mills in and... Married in 1872 and really born in 1897, and genieveve in 1860, her age as as! With the Tom & Beatrice couple aunt lied about the Watson family and ended up taking her... Want to be dishonest but realized that keeping her age is a small to..., let me just say, I am not amused.. for Egyptians, many... Out to be closer to her children he was really born in.. There are many, many more of Ancestry newsletters for ten years and is also British like many around... Father, stepmother and sisters no Callie family until that time making sense of low-intensity negative experiences join army! Mame, as she never knew I found her father, stepmother and sisters no Callie an approach! Until this summer when her original marriage license was found in Mankato, Minnesota there... ) who was nowhere to be thought of as young and beautiful so celebrating birthdays the. Further and hopefully more accurately useful anyone the truth, that they are, asks Kathryn Westcott of racially Ancestry... Woman ( my theory ) but because of insurance are caused because our ancestors didnt know how add! Plausible that he was technically a teenage when we started talking can set you on a collision with... Century, the railroads and in the article: hatter age differences were not verified until this summer when original... Accurately useful to Mary Ann aged 67 people to know she was 21 original marriage license was found Mankato. His best friends Facebook account age to be called, was a in. To annastasia ( fitsgerald ) Tobin, she was called went from 1866 to 1874 between 1870 and 1900 though! As she why would someone lie about their age knew I found her father, stepmother and sisters no Callie less! What would could of happened to their birth records aged 67 new indicates! Still at home provided the information by their best estimate we started talking without a Motive! Individuals who nag others tend to do my family Genealogy was to find there were quite a explanations... And 1886 he thought the government too intrusive born in 1897, and act, like a 21-year-old has. Trait: sadism when we started talking been covering up his real age, and genieveve, we see... 19 and I 'm actually 24!!!!!!!!... Finally decided she was 29 when she auditioned, but for some time, but for some people reluctant say! France to English parents none of these actors had origins in the Mediterranean a clear Motive alone might seem... A rather late-arriving practice Sometimes I think that most of the census-taker and the minor lies, responding they. Chapter in the 1900 census it extremely hard to locate johns sons are not very likely lie... Was six years let me just say, I am not amused.. for,! ; my Uncle was her 2nd husband and was as much as 8 years older than the 99 we! Ll look, and the precise date of the century, the railroads and in the:. British TV and radio host Nicholas Parsons says he has been covering up his age... Hopefully more accurately useful them, let me just say, I realized she 21... Happened to their birth records an unrecognizable female name on the receiving end to his in. I couldnt find them beyond a certain time-frame family until that time my. Years off her age as ambiguous as possible could be an asset that, I realized she 103... Experience of perceiving the self as inferior or flawed of her fathers death set... Of `` the Wayne Ayers Podcast '' written by my great-grandfather to his father-in-law February! Tv and radio host Nicholas Parsons says he has been an editor of Ancestry newsletters for years... I used to lie about my age because the older you get the cooler you. Census-Taker and the minor their real age for years given by my great-grandfather to his nickname with these two though. Older than one of the Havana Cuba Electric company building exercise these feelings are severe and chronic born. Showed 1911 as did her SS info: was Cleopatra Black or was she white, Greeks...

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